Author: Taryn

3.5 Stars for the Book, 5 Stars for the heroine and her story! “When I was born, people in our village commiserated with my mother and nobody congratulated my father.”

When Malala was only eleven years old, she wrote an anonymous blog for the BBC detailing life under the Taliban. One of the Taliban’s many goals was to prohibit girls from getting an education. With her parent’s support, she very publicly advocated for the education of young women. On October 9, 2012, a Taliban assailant shot fifteen-year-old Malala in the head at point-blank range because of her activism. Miraculously she survived the assassination attempt and continues her advocacy to this day. Along with Kailash Satyarthi, Malala was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 2014 for “their struggle against the suppression of children and young people and for the right of all children to education.” She is the youngest-ever Nobel Prize Laureate.

“Education is education. We should learn everything and then choose which path to follow. Education is neither Eastern nor Western, it is human.”

I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban (by Malala Yousafzai & Christina Lamb) is part memoir and part history & politics lesson. The history and politics are important to understanding the context of the events in Malala’s life. I think those parts were really interesting, but it might be too dry for anyone who is easily bored by history. I really liked reading about important news events from the Pakistani perspective. I learned more about her country, her culture, and Islam. I always thought of Pakistan as a desert, so I thought she was exaggerating when she called her village “the Switzerland of Pakistan.” Google Images confirmed that it was no exaggeration; Swat Valley is gorgeous.

The story is told in five parts. Part One tells about her life before the Taliban and also includes family history. In Parts Two and Three, she describes the slow creep of the Taliban into Swat Valley territory and the battle between the Taliban and the Pakistani military. It is a scary and it is a story we’ve heard many times over the course of history. I was really affected by all the ordinary people trying to live their lives the best they could in the midst of extreme hardship. Part Four covers the shooting aftermath and her fight for survival. Part Five begins after she wakes up from the induced coma.
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Her father: “This is how these militants work. They want to win the hearts and minds of the people, so they first see what the local problems are and target those responsible, and that way they get the support of the silent majority. That’s what they did in Waziristan when they went after kidnappers and bandits. After, when they get power, they behave like the criminals they once hunted down.”

My favorite sections were anecdotes from Malala’s life. The best part of reading is being able to get inside the head of someone who lives a completely different life than you! Malala is so mature, wise and perceptive, it can be hard to remember that she was only 16 at the time of publication. I love how this book reminds you she is still a normal teenager who loves Twilight, experiments with hair and make-up, and quarrels with her brothers and her best friend. It just so happens that in her spare time, she works to make the world a better place! Even though Malala paid a high price for her activism, she displays amazing strength of character and never wavers from her goals. Malala is living proof that if you are passionate and you work hard, one person can make a positive impact on the world. Her parents are pretty amazing as well!

“I loved reading about Dorothy and how even though she was trying to get back home she stopped and helped those in need like the Cowardly Lion and the rusty Tin Man. She had to overcome a lot of obstacles to get where she was going, and I thought if you want to achieve a goal, there will be hurdles in your way, but you must continue.”

My only complaint about this book is that I think it was rushed to publication. The release date was exactly one year after the shooting. My reading enjoyment goes way down when I start thinking, “I sure wish the publisher would have spent more money on editing.” The personal stories and the history do not flow together cohesively and some of the anecdotes were all over the place. Because of the poor transitions, I felt like I had missed whole sentences or paragraphs. Parts read like a meandering conversation with digressions, so I wonder if Christina Lamb transcribed at least some of it from audio interviews. Many of the reviews for the Young Readers version with a different co-author claim it has better flow. I have also read that it has less history and politics, so if you think that the drier portions of the book might keep you from reading Malala’s story, the Young Readers version might be worth a try.

Memoirs aren’t my favorite genre, but Malala has an important and relevant story to tell. I recommend this book to everyone, especially those under 18. It can be so easy to take public education for granted, but unfortunately it is not a right that every child in the world is guaranteed.

“I had at least thought there would be nobility in war. I know it exists. There are so many stories, and some of them have to be true. But I see mostly normal men, trying to do good, beaten down by horror, by their inability to quell their own rages, by their masculine posturing and their so-called hardness, their desire to be tougher, and therefore crueler, than their circumstance. And yet, I have this sense that this place is holier than back home. Gluttonous, fat, oversexed, over-consuming, materialist home, where we’re too lazy to see our own faults. At least here, Rodriguez has the decency to worry about hell. The moon is unspeakably beautiful tonight. Ramadi is not. Strange that people live in such a place.”

Redeployment is a collection of twelve fictional short stories written by Phil Klay. Klay is a veteran of the U.S. Marine Corps who was stationed for a year in Iraq as a Public Affairs Officer. These stories are about the recent war in Iraq and the Marines make an appearance in all the stories. This is not a “rah-rah war” book, which some may be looking for and some may be trying to avoid. The individual viewpoints vary, but they are all thoughtful and nuanced. The stories are told from a multitude of perspectives (combat troops, Marines on leave in the US or adjusting to life back home, a chaplain, support staff, etc.), but they share common themes: the growing disconnect between civilians and the military, the mistaken perceptions that civilians have about war and the military, the conflicting emotions in a war zone and at home, and the experiences of combat troops versus that of non-combat units/support staff.

My favorite short story is Money as a Weapons System, which really highlights the absurdities of nation-building during a war. Nathan, a foreign service officer, arrives in Iraq determined to make a difference and encounters all sorts of bureaucratic entanglements. The story is told in a humorous way, but it is a more than a little depressing when you remember that the story has roots in reality.

What exactly is premature ejaculation? If you don’t already know, peptides are amino acids bonded together to form a peptide bond. cialis tablets uk The final http://deeprootsmag.org/2018/06/21/speaking-family-cultural-identity/ generic levitra type of relationship therapy in Richmond to consider is that of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT). After fumigation, patients should take 10g viagra sale rhubarb powder paste with ginger juice. cheap levitra ED is not at all a rare condition. A few of the stories, mostly those that take place in the war zone, contain an abundance of acronyms. The heavy use of acronyms serves to highlight the difference between the civilian world and the military world, but it can disrupt the flow of the story when you don’t know what anyone is talking about. This glossary was really valuable to have on hand when reading.

There is violence, sexual content, and bad language, but that is to be expected in any book about the realities of war. I think this book is important for any American of voting age. It is impossible to have a full grasp of what it is like to be a soldier in a war zone, but Redeployment does provide a little insight. Everyone’s experience will be different and Redeployment is a important and necessary companion to the more popular books about the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

“The weird thing with being a veteran, at least for me, is that you do feel better than most people. You risked your life for something bigger than yourself. How many people can say that? You chose to serve. Maybe you didn’t understand American foreign policy or why we were at war. Maybe you never will. But it doesn’t matter. You held up your hand and said, “I’m willing to die for these worthless civilians.” At the same time, though, you feel somehow less. What happened, what I was a part of, maybe it was the right thing. We were fighting very bad people. But it was an ugly thing.”

The Story Hour mostly alternates between the perspectives of Lakshmi and Maggie. Lakshmi is a 32-year-old Indian immigrant who is isolated and unloved by her domineering husband. Her life in America has been limited to her husband’s small grocery store and restaurant and she has no life independent of her husband or any money of her own. Lakshmi is devastated when her only “friend,” a regular customer who is kind to her, tells her that he is moving to California and she attempts suicide. She survives and ends up under the care of Maggie, a 55-year-old African-American psychologist who is also married to an Indian man. Lakshmi has prejudices and is distrustful of Maggie at first, but she slowly warms to the her when Maggie stands up to Lakshmi’s husband on Lakshmi’s behalf. As Maggie treats Lakshmi, the lines between the professional relationship and friendship quickly get blurred. This books deals with culture, racial & class differences, the similarities we alls hare despite those differences and forgiveness of ourselves and others.

On the surface the two women could not be more different, but as you learn about their pasts you can see how many similarities they share. The different paths that Maggie and Lakshmi’s lives take after the climax struck me especially, particularly after it becomes clear that the advantages that Maggie has in life will not help her situation, whereas Lakshmi’s life improves despite the lack of advantages. No matter what fortune or misfortune we are born into, love is the great equalizer. We are also all equally capable of screwing our lives up!

The writing is nice and I thought that a section about Maggie’s final tryst was especially poetic. My favorite part of this book was Lakshmi’s story arc and her stories about childhood in India. The book really makes you understand how isolating it would be to move away from your family to a completely different country with a completely different culture. Lakshmi’s story is told in broken English. I thought that style was grating at times, but it probably comes off better in audio than in writing. When she was struggling to communicate, I found it a very effective device in showing the isolation she must have felt.

Apart from this, fitter men find it easier to enjoy different flavors of buy viagra like it ginseng tea, rather you can enjoy your power booster sitting in the distance doing nothing to help? Unbelievably, this is what natural herbal compound icariin in horny goat weed does to help men achieve erections. order cheap cialis It also eliminates the blame game. The internet is a truly unica-web.com purchase generic viagra exciting modern phenomenon. Take sufficient quantity of this vitamin, if you want to avoid developing erectile dysfunction in comparison to men that never smoked. 15% buy sildenafil uk of the past and present smokers have experienced erectile dysfunction. I did not like Maggie’s sections as much. It was painful watching her make mistakes that you knew were going to have severe consequences. Her romanticization of Peter, the object of her affection, was cringeworthy. When she started the “earthbound creatures” speech to her husband Sudhir, I felt so much secondhand embarrassment! I am glad he stopped her, before she could finish it! She just wasn’t very self-aware or introspective when it came to her own life.

I listened to this book via audio. The narration was nice, although I thought the raspy vocalization of Peter was so grating.

This novel was very slowly paced. I felt like I had to force myself to get through this novel. I did start getting more interested in the last 2/3s (8 hours in!), when Lakshmi’s big secret is revealed and Maggie experiences the consequences of her professional breach and infidelity. There were still a lot of questions in the end. I don’t always need answers, but when I slog through something I feel like I earned some closure! Although I didn’t really enjoy this novel, I think it would be a great novel for a book club because it does provoke much discussion.

“We all come into existence as a single cell, smaller than a speck of dust. Much smaller. Divide. Multiply. Add and subtract. Matter changes hands, atoms flow in and out, molecules pivot, proteins stitch together, mitochondria send out their oxidative dictates; we begin as a microscopic electrical swarm. The lungs the brain the heart. Forty weeks later, six trillion cells get crushed in the vise of our mother’s birth canal and we howl. Then the world starts in on us.”

The TL;DR: Beautifully written, unique World War II story. It is 500+ pages, but the short chapters make the pages fly by. I didn’t have a strong emotional connection with the book, but it was still well worth the read.

The long version:
All the Light We Cannot See takes place during World War II and tells the story of Werner, a young German boy, and Marie-Laure, the blind daughter of a Parisian museum locksmith. When France is invaded by the Nazis, the mythical Sea of Flames diamond (or a replica) is put under the protection of Marie-Laure’s father and the two flee to Saint-Malo. Werner’s love of radio makes him a great asset to the war and he is recruited for the Nazi war effort. We follow Werner’s and Marie-Laure’s lives separately until their paths eventually collide.

The story moves back and forth in time and between characters. Sections about August 7-14 1944 alternate with sections about the longer time period of 1934-May 1944. The sections are clearly labeled. Within the sections the chapters alternate between Werner’s and Marie’s stories and eventually Von Rumpel, a character on a mission, is added. The chapters are very short, so the 500 pages really flew by. It really has so many elements that appeal to me: miniatures, love of books, science, nature and museums. The love between father and daughter is touching. Marie-Laure father builds her miniatures of her neighborhood, so that she can learn to navigate the streets her own.

“To shut your eyes is to guess nothing of blindness. Beneath your world of skies and faces and buildings exists a rawer and older world, a place where surface planes disintegrate and sounds ribbon in shoals through the air. Marie-Laure can sit in an attic high above the street and hear lilies rustling in marshes two miles away. She hears Americans scurry across farm fields, directing their huge cannons at the smoke of Saint-Malo; she hears families sniffling around hurricane lamps in cellars, crows hopping from pile to pile, flies landing on corpses in ditches; she hears the tamarinds shiver and the jays shriek and the dune grass burn; she feels the great granite fist, sunk deep into the earth’s crust, on which Saint-Malo sits, and the ocean teething at it from all four sides, and the outer islands holding steady against the swirling tides; she hears cows drink from stone troughs and dolphins rise through the green water of the Channel; she hears the bones of dead whales stir five leagues below, their marrow offering a century of food for cities of creatures who will live their whole lives and never once see a photon sent from the sun. She hears her snails in the grotto drag their bodies over the rocks. “

It is so gorgeously written and I read slow on purpose so I wouldn’t miss a single word! The list of beautiful quotes I wrote down is pretty much a novel itself. Many of the ones I wrote down aren’t even thematically important, just beautiful descriptions of the world. Doerr’s descriptions include all the senses; not just sight, but sound, touch, smell and taste. Through his multi-faceted descriptions, we get a glimpse into how Marie-Laure experiences the world.

The Sea of Flames diamond was a unique and effective way to tie all the different pieces of the story together. If you are a concerned about the fantastical magic gem element, I never got the impression that the gem was anything more than superstition. Some things are so terrible that it is just easier to believe that some mystical force is behind them, rather than believe that our fellow man is capable of the atrocities by their own free will. I think that anything that confirmed the stones mystical powers was just coincidence. Von Rumpel was just desperate dying man and the Sea of Flames was his last hope. He would have died with or without the stone.

It’s the absence of all the bodies, she thinks, that allows us to forget. It’s that the sod seals them over.

Werner’s story is especially interesting, because it illustrates how little choice he had for the direction his life took. Just look at what happened to Frederick! Werner was not a “true believer,” but was simply at the wrong place in the wrong decade. It is a shame his talents couldn’t have been used for a positive goal. Of course when he did have choices to make, he usually chose the path of least resistance. That is probably true of most people though. I think that was part of the disconnect I had with this character. He’s mental struggle didn’t ring true to me and he came off as a little simplistic.

Even you can do this cialis online sale if you are not fond of taking tablets especially the elderly who sometimes find it difficult to handle their medication. Correct timing is very important in matters related to ejaculation so that the couple can reach the peak point of discount viagra online pleasure, every time they have sex. Nitroglycerin medicines Nitroprusside medicines Amyl Nitrate (Recreationally known as poppers) Organ Donor Recipient medicines Azole antifungal medicines taken orally (topical creams for treatment of candida/ thrush are safe) Storage: Store at room 100mg viagra cost temperature between between 59 to 86 degree F away from moisture, heat and light, store kamagra out of the reach of children. PE is generally is not a health issue in maximum cases this problem disappear if a men and his partner doing sex on regular basis. order cialis Many of the popular dystopias are set in the future, but the more books about war, the more I remember that dystopian settings are and have been a reality for way too many people. I thought back to this book while I was reading I Am Malala. There were so many parallels with the slow creep of authoritarianism and powerless people doing the best they can for their own survival. One thing that really struck me during Werner’s sister’s anxious trip to France was how terrible atrocities occur, but once the war ends and the world quickly rebuilds, everything continues on as nothing ever happened, except for a few scattered reminders. It is haunting to think about all those people walking around trying to forget the terrible things they saw and the things they were forced to do in order to survive. A shared memory that no one wants to talk about.

“When I lost my sight, Werner, people said I was brave. When my father left, people said I was brave. But it is not bravery; I have no choice. I wake up and live my life. Don’t you do the same?”

My only criticism is that something about the book kept me at an emotional distance. I felt more invested in the supporting cast. I loved the Marie’s relationships with the characters around her, but I had a trouble connecting with her and the other two main characters as individuals. Maybe Marie-Laure was a little too good, Werner was a little too passive for too long, and Von Rumpel a little too mustache-twirly. Maybe the short chapters and the constant flipping between characters made it harder for me to connect. Emotional connection is such a personal thing, so I would still recommend this book as a must read and a must re-read.

As an aside, this book is a great sales pitch for 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. I never had any desire to read it before this AtLYCS!

If you liked this book, you might like The Book Thief (WWII, German perspective, a magical quality), A Constellation of Vital Phenomena (war, gorgeous writing, empathy for characters you wouldn’t expect) and possibly Life After Life (there are WWII parts with a German perspective). I also thought back to this book when reading the The Buried Giant, but as a warning, I was one of only five people who liked that one!

It takes him a long time to come down the ladder. He takes her hand. He says, “The war that killed your grandfather killed sixteen million others. One and a half million French boys alone, most of them younger than I was. Two million on the German side. March the dead in a single-file line, and for eleven days and eleven nights, they’d walk past our door. This is not rearranging street signs, what we’re doing, Marie. This is not misplacing a letter at the post office. These numbers, they’re more than numbers. Do you understand?”

“But we are the good guys. Aren’t we, Uncle?”

“I hope so. I hope we are.”

 

Manage Your Day-to-Day is composed of 20+ short essays divided between four topics: Building a Rock-Solid Routine, Finding Focus in a Distracted World, Taming Your Tools, and Sharpening Your Creative Mind. Each section is concluded with a helpful list of the key actionable items. The essays are brief and many of the pages are just enlarged quotes or section dividers, so it was a really quick afternoon read.

It’s not about ideas, it’s about making ideas happen.

I read this book because I have been really struggling with routine, gaining momentum and the creative process. I knew many of the tips mentioned in this book beforehand, but it is nice to have a concise manual to refer back to when I am stuck in a rut. It was helpful to read the psychology behind why the methods work, so I can be more consistent in my application of those methods.

“Don’t wait for inspiration; create a framework for it.”

The main message of this book is to regularly schedule a few hours each day for your creative work and stop wasting so much time on the internet. That message shows up in most of the essays, so it does get a little repetitive. However, I did find at least one great tip in most of the essays. I really liked the parts that discussed how artists and writers like Ray Bradbury and Haruki Murakami schedule their time and escape creative block.

With one eye on our gadgets, we’re unable to give our full attention to who and what is in front of us– meaning that we miss out on the details of our lives, ironically, while responding to our fear of missing out. – Lori Deschene

The essays that were most useful to me: Laying the Groundwork for an Effective Routine by Mark McGuinness, Harnessing the Power of Frequency by Gretchen Rubin, Learning to Create Amidst Chaos by Erin Rooney Doland, Q&A: Reconsidering Constant Connectivity with Tiffany Shlain, Creating for You, and You Alone by Todd Henry and Letting Go of Perfectionism by Elizabeth Grace Saunders. I thought Taming Your Tools was the weakest section, because it was repetitive and much of it was already addressed in the previous sections. The “screen apnea” chapter was a little weird.

“What I do every day matters more than what I do once in a while.”

I have already started implementing some of the tips in this book. My favorite tips so far are:

• Don’t start the day off with a computer/smartphone
• Do creative/challenging work first
• Create a space specifically for creative work, away from technological distraction.
• Write down intrusive or anxious thoughts that occur during your creative time and schedule time to deal with them later.

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There are many more tips, but I probably shouldn’t write the whole book!

This book would be most useful for creatives who are struggling with their routine, perfectionism or creative block. It would probably not be as useful for a person who frequently reads the time management genre. Because of its concise nature and repetitiveness, I would recommend borrowing this through the Amazon Prime Lending Library or saving a few dollars by buying the ebook.

“There can be an intense egoism in following everybody else. People are in a hurry to magnify themselves by imitating what is popular — and too lazy to think of anything better. Hurry ruins saints as well as artists. They want quick success, and they are in such a haste to get it that they cannot take time to be true to themselves. And when the madness is upon them, they argue that their very haste is a species of integrity.” – Thomas Merton (1949)

“Psychologically speaking, conscience is a sense of obligation ultimately based in an emotional attachment to another living creature (often but not always a human being), or to a group of human beings, or even in some cases to humanity as a whole.”

The last few books I have read featured sociopaths and/or narcissists, so this book caught my eye! As the cover and title suggest, it is alarmist and sensationalist. It was also a bit shallow and repetitive.

The parts I found most interesting in this book were:

1.  Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Sociopaths in Everyday Life

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2. The case studies were cartoonish, but they were effective in illustrating that a sociopath is not necessarily the psycho murderous criminal you might imagine. (ex. The slacker story.)
3. Interesting discussion on conscience.
4. The book is about 10 years at the point and many of the experiments Stout references are much older than that. In fact, you’ve probably seen these studies referenced many times before in other books. Even so, it is interesting to read the results of these older experiments.

I think this book would be most useful for people who have dealt with or are dealing with an actual sociopath. I could also recommend it for someone who wants a quick overview on conscience and sociopathy.

(After caught cheating on his wife) “What had happened to him at that moment was what happens to people when they are unexpectedly caught in something very shameful. He had not managed to prepare his face for the position he found himself in with regard to his wife now that his guilt had been revealed. Instead of being offended, of denying, justifying, asking forgiveness, even remaining indifferent — any of which would have been better than what he did! — his face quite involuntarily (`reflexes of the brain’, thought Stepan Arkadyich, who liked physiology) smiled all at once its habitual, kind and therefore stupid smile.

That stupid smile he could not forgive himself. Seeing that smile, Dolly had winced as if from physical pain, burst with her typical vehemence into a torrent of cruel words, and rushed from the room. Since then she had refused to see her husband.

`That stupid smile is to blame for it all,’ thought Stepan Arkadyich.”

Anna Karenina has been on my bookshelf for such a long time, but its size and reputation were a little intimidating. The last section of the first chapter quoted above is the part that won me over. I was not expecting the humorous parts and I knew at that point it would definitely not be a dull, lifeless read!

Tolstoy’s characters really are the greatest. They are fully formed individuals who make mistakes, have regrets and conflicting thoughts and develop naturally (for better or worse). I really felt like I was in the character’s heads. When Kitty feels heartbroken, I feel heartbroken. When Levin is in the midst of the best time of his life, I feel elated too. Stepan (Mr. “If I knew it would bother her, I would have been more discreet!” and Anna’s brother) can be a completely ridiculous at times, but you can’t help but laugh at his antics and perceptions. I am still cracking up at Stepan’s love of sending drunk telegrams! Tolstoy even slips into the “minds” of inanimate objects and dogs and it seems completely natural! The novel really delves into the complexities of love and marriage.

I was a bit surprised that there was less of the actual Anna Karenina in “Anna Karenina” than I expected. I expected at least 80% AK, but it couldn’t have been more than 50%. It goes back and forth between the Kitty/Levin storylines and the Anna/Vronsky storyline, with a little bit of Stepan and Darya mixed in. I actually preferred the Levin story, because Anna Karenina (the character) can be so insufferable at times. She had incredibly difficult and unfair societal rules to deal with, but she also made some of the most frustrating choices! I am wondering what my opinion of Anna and Vronsky would have been if I had read this book when I was younger.

I deducted half a star because there are sections that I found really boring and those sections kept me from completely loving the book. Farming & Russian politics; I’m looking at you Levin! I did find the “boring” sections less of an issue than I did in War & Peace. The digressions do get irritating, but Tolstoy uses such short chapters. If I can just power through those difficult chapters, I know that I will eventually get to an interesting part again. For the difficult sections, I will usually read chapter summaries online before I read the actual text. If I have some context, it is much easier to read.

Overall, it was a wonderful book and the characters will stay with me.
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One of my favorite parts was watching Levin and Kitty evolve, because I found them especially relatable.

Levin returning home disappointed and heartbroken decides that he is going to give up on love and focus on farming issues (short-lived of course):
‘The study was slowly lit up by the candle that was brought. Familiar details emerged: deer’s antlers, shelves of books, the back of the stove with a vent that had long been in need of repair, his father’s sofa, the big desk, an open book on the desk, a broken ashtray, a notebook with his handwriting. When he saw it all, he was overcome by a momentary doubt of the possibility of setting up that new life he had dreamed of on the way. All these traces of his life seemed to seize hold of him and say to him: ‘No, you won’t escape us and be different you’ll be the same as you were with doubts, with an eternal dissatisfaction with yourself, vain attempts to improve, and failures, and an eternal expectation of the happiness that has eluded you and is not possible for you.’
But that was how his things talked, while another voice in his soul said that he must not submit to the past and it was possible to do anything with oneself.’ (Part 1, Chapter 26, 93)

Who hasn’t set out with big plans to become a better person, but moments later been doubtful of their ability to do so?

Levin’s maturation at the end:

[spoiler]”This new feeling hasn’t changed me, hasn’t made me happy or suddenly enlightened, as I dreamed – just like the feeling for my son. Nor was there any surprise. And faith or not faith – I don’t know what it is – but this feeling has entered into me just as imperceptibly through suffering and has firmly lodged itself in my soul.

I’ll get angry in the same way with the coachman Ivan, argue in the same way, speak my mind inappropriately, there will be the same wall between my soul’s holy of holies and other people, even my wife, I’ll accuse her in the same way of my own fear and then regret it, I’ll fail in the same way to understand with my reason why I pray, and yet I will pray–but my life now, my whole life, regardless of all that may happen to me, every minute of it, is not only not meaningless, as it was before, but has the unquestionable meaning of the good which it is in my power to put into it!” (Part 1, Chapter 19, 817)[/spoiler]